George Will
E J Dionne
Dana Millbank
“The West is politically reactionary and exploitive: admit it. The West as a whole is guilty of inexplicable crimes against the land: admit that, too. The West is rootless, culturally half-baked. So be it.” - Wallace Stegner
This flu makes my whole body hurt, the Denver Post reported that 5 children have died from it so far in Colorado. Thinking is a chore, so I'm curling up with my cat whether he like it or not, time to start paying me back for all of that tuna...
From the Political Animal: "That the Financial Times has a headline that reads "Greenspan Backs Bank Nationalization" is truly a sign that we live in strange, strange times."
From the Washington Post: "I did not mean to kill the leader of the occupation forces," Muntadhar al-Zeidi said, speaking clearly and forcefully from a wooden cage before a packed courtroom. "I was expressing what's inside of me and what's inside the Iraqi people from north to south and from west to east."
Throwing his shoes, fastball style, at the leader of the free world was not, Zeidi argued, a crime.
Zeidi, 30, who is charged with assaulting a foreign head of state, posited that Bush's Dec. 14 trip to Baghdad was not an official visit by a foreign dignitary because he arrived to the country without prior notice and didn't leave the Green Zone, which at the time was still under American control.
"I am charged now with attacking the prime minister's guest," he said stoically, making his first public remarks since the incident. "We Arabs are famous for being generous with guests. But Bush and his soldiers have been here for six years. Guests should knock on the door. Those who come sneaking in are not guests."
Roughly an hour into the hearing, Presiding Judge Abdul Amir al-Rubaie announced that he would postpone the proceeding until March 12 to seek an opinion from the Iraqi government about whether Bush's swan song visit to Baghdad was, in fact, an "official" one.
Late night jokes:
"And, you know, you got to admit, President Obama gives great speeches. Like, today, instead of just saying, 'Oh, from North to South,' he said, 'From the windy plains of the Dakotas to the sunny skies of Arizona.' That sounds so much better than, 'From the sleaze ball criminal element of Wall Street to the broke-a@# beaches of California.'" --Jay Leno
"And there are a lot of new taxes coming. California state legislators want to solve our state's giant deficit by taxing marijuana. Meanwhile, Oregon wants to increase a tax on beer, while New York wants to tax Internet porn. You know what this means? By the end of spring break, this whole thing could be paid for." --Jay Leno
"Well, here's something I learned on the Discovery Channel. Researchers say that animals actually plan for the future. And I think it's true. For example, do you know that most animals sold all their stocks at the end of 2006?" --Jay Leno
"And one of the hardest hit businesses in this failing economy is plastic surgery. Fewer and fewer people are getting plastic surgery. How ironic is that? The one time you really need a smile on your face, you can't even afford to get it." --Jay Leno
"I tell you, the economy's in bad shape. It is in such bad shape that today, three stock brokers tried to kill themselves by eating peanuts." --Jay Leno
"And California? that's no day at the beach either. Oh, California, I tell you. Today, I saw Governor Schwarzenegger dyeing his hair with an orange Sharpie. 'You godda get da color back in dere.'" --Jay Leno
"And in Venezuela, a referendum passed that will allow Hugo Chavez to keep running for president indefinitely. So down there, it will be kind of like what Ralph Nader does here." --Jay Leno
"And police in Mexico found a pickup truck with side panels and bumpers that were made entirely of cocaine. Police got suspicious when the guy had a minor fender bender and claimed $2.5 million in damages." --Jay Leno
"A new study says that the bad economy can lower testosterone levels in men. Scientists say at this rate, by the end of the decade, Ann Coulter could be a woman!" --Craig Ferguson
"According to the 'Financial Times,' Barack Obama, they're saying, is moving towards Swedish models of banking. A president moving towards Swedish models? That hasn't happened since the Clinton Administration." --Craig Ferguson
"I'm very worried about the economy. Hopefully, our problems will be over soon. And I think they will be because today, President Obama finally signed the stimulus bill, which is supposed to create 3.5 million jobs. It'll fund new roads and new bridges. They've even put aside $8 billion for new trains. I smell Vice President Joe Biden. He loves trains." --Craig Ferguson
"President Obama today signed his trillion dollar economic stimulus bill into law. The spending package passed through Congress with almost no Republican support, but Obama says he's still focused on bringing real bipartisanship to government. He even went so far as to send every Republican in Congress today a jar of peanuts, which I thought was nice." --Jimmy Kimmel
From the Political Animal: "That the Financial Times has a headline that reads "Greenspan Backs Bank Nationalization" is truly a sign that we live in strange, strange times."
Also: "Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an "off the hook" public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party's principles to "urban-suburban hip-hop settings."
The RNC's first black chairman will "surprise everyone" when updating the party's image using the Internet and advertisements on radio, on television and in print, he told The Washington Times.
Steele said the party needs "messengers" who can capture a "region" made up of "young, Hispanic, black, a cross section." He added, "We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.... [W]e need to uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets."
Steele went on to explain his public-relations vision, saying, "It will be avant garde, technically. It will come to table with things that will surprise everyone -- off the hook."Asked if he imagines a cutting-edge approach, Steele replied, "I don't do 'cutting-edge.' That's what Democrats are doing. We're going beyond cutting-edge."
Raise your hand if you think Michael Steele has the foggiest idea what he's talking about
The RNC's first black chairman will "surprise everyone" when updating the party's image using the Internet and advertisements on radio, on television and in print, he told The Washington Times.
Steele said the party needs "messengers" who can capture a "region" made up of "young, Hispanic, black, a cross section." He added, "We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.... [W]e need to uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets."
Steele went on to explain his public-relations vision, saying, "It will be avant garde, technically. It will come to table with things that will surprise everyone -- off the hook."Asked if he imagines a cutting-edge approach, Steele replied, "I don't do 'cutting-edge.' That's what Democrats are doing. We're going beyond cutting-edge."
Raise your hand if you think Michael Steele has the foggiest idea what he's talking about
From the Washington Post: "I did not mean to kill the leader of the occupation forces," Muntadhar al-Zeidi said, speaking clearly and forcefully from a wooden cage before a packed courtroom. "I was expressing what's inside of me and what's inside the Iraqi people from north to south and from west to east."
Throwing his shoes, fastball style, at the leader of the free world was not, Zeidi argued, a crime.
Zeidi, 30, who is charged with assaulting a foreign head of state, posited that Bush's Dec. 14 trip to Baghdad was not an official visit by a foreign dignitary because he arrived to the country without prior notice and didn't leave the Green Zone, which at the time was still under American control.
"I am charged now with attacking the prime minister's guest," he said stoically, making his first public remarks since the incident. "We Arabs are famous for being generous with guests. But Bush and his soldiers have been here for six years. Guests should knock on the door. Those who come sneaking in are not guests."
Roughly an hour into the hearing, Presiding Judge Abdul Amir al-Rubaie announced that he would postpone the proceeding until March 12 to seek an opinion from the Iraqi government about whether Bush's swan song visit to Baghdad was, in fact, an "official" one.
Late night jokes:
"And, you know, you got to admit, President Obama gives great speeches. Like, today, instead of just saying, 'Oh, from North to South,' he said, 'From the windy plains of the Dakotas to the sunny skies of Arizona.' That sounds so much better than, 'From the sleaze ball criminal element of Wall Street to the broke-a@# beaches of California.'" --Jay Leno
"And there are a lot of new taxes coming. California state legislators want to solve our state's giant deficit by taxing marijuana. Meanwhile, Oregon wants to increase a tax on beer, while New York wants to tax Internet porn. You know what this means? By the end of spring break, this whole thing could be paid for." --Jay Leno
"Well, here's something I learned on the Discovery Channel. Researchers say that animals actually plan for the future. And I think it's true. For example, do you know that most animals sold all their stocks at the end of 2006?" --Jay Leno
"And one of the hardest hit businesses in this failing economy is plastic surgery. Fewer and fewer people are getting plastic surgery. How ironic is that? The one time you really need a smile on your face, you can't even afford to get it." --Jay Leno
"I tell you, the economy's in bad shape. It is in such bad shape that today, three stock brokers tried to kill themselves by eating peanuts." --Jay Leno
"And California? that's no day at the beach either. Oh, California, I tell you. Today, I saw Governor Schwarzenegger dyeing his hair with an orange Sharpie. 'You godda get da color back in dere.'" --Jay Leno
"And in Venezuela, a referendum passed that will allow Hugo Chavez to keep running for president indefinitely. So down there, it will be kind of like what Ralph Nader does here." --Jay Leno
"And police in Mexico found a pickup truck with side panels and bumpers that were made entirely of cocaine. Police got suspicious when the guy had a minor fender bender and claimed $2.5 million in damages." --Jay Leno
"A new study says that the bad economy can lower testosterone levels in men. Scientists say at this rate, by the end of the decade, Ann Coulter could be a woman!" --Craig Ferguson
"According to the 'Financial Times,' Barack Obama, they're saying, is moving towards Swedish models of banking. A president moving towards Swedish models? That hasn't happened since the Clinton Administration." --Craig Ferguson
"I'm very worried about the economy. Hopefully, our problems will be over soon. And I think they will be because today, President Obama finally signed the stimulus bill, which is supposed to create 3.5 million jobs. It'll fund new roads and new bridges. They've even put aside $8 billion for new trains. I smell Vice President Joe Biden. He loves trains." --Craig Ferguson
"President Obama today signed his trillion dollar economic stimulus bill into law. The spending package passed through Congress with almost no Republican support, but Obama says he's still focused on bringing real bipartisanship to government. He even went so far as to send every Republican in Congress today a jar of peanuts, which I thought was nice." --Jimmy Kimmel
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