Thursday, August 11, 2011

London Calling, Them Crazy Eyes

Richard Sennett
Leslie Bennetts
"Only a couple of days until the big Republican Iowa Republican straw poll. Pollsters say it's a dead heat between the guy you never heard of, the guy who used to be somebody, and the woman who has no chance of winning." – Jay Leno
"We owe China more than a trillion dollars. Why don't we just give them Florida?" – Jimmy Kimmel
"I don't want to say the economy is worrisome, but I turned on CNN and MSNBC and the blond anchor lady was just sitting there eating a pint of ice cream." – Bill Maher

I've been watching debates between pundits over whether we'll see riots like the ones in Britain here in the US. Let's see, do we have a large amount of people who are unemployed? Are many of them young,  sitting around growing sullen and bored? We might as well start betting on which month it will happen in, maybe which city... You would think that a group of angry people in the US would feel solidarity with the London rioters, but the tea partiers are scared to death. After all, Britain is in the middle of austerity measures, they are shrinking the government and firing over 16,000 police officers next year, and that was planned before the hacking scandal broke... Now that we have committed to $2 trillion in cuts, we will be laying off thousands of government workers, releasing thousands of soldiers from active duty, yet retaining the generals in the Pentagon that can't keep track of $70 billion in Afghanistan. We will cut back on all social services, and if you have a child with special needs, good luck, you are on your own unless you want them to have a lecture on the benefits of abstinence...

I'm surprised that we haven't had more riots around the world. The demonstrations in the Middle East began over rising food prices and the lack of jobs. Neither of those problems have been solved, if anything, they have only gotten worse. Expect riots in Iraq and Afghanistan once the US leaves and the populations realize just how badly their own governments suck... We really haven't had a knock down, send in the tanks riot in Pakistan yet, and once we leave the region, they won't have us as a scapegoat anymore, and can safely turn on each other. Damn, that means that a few more Sufi shrines will get destroyed...

As always, for an even scarier view of the world, we can always go to either Russia or Germany. From Spiegal online: "One month ahead of a state election in Berlin, the far-right extremist NPD party is under fire for a provocative new campaign poster. Party leader Udo Voigt is pictured on a motorcycle with a phrase that translates to "step on the gas," a slogan many are reading as an open allusion to Nazi death chambers..."

Speaking of ranting, here's Bill Maher:
"The only way they’re going to pull the debate back from the far right is for liberals to elect their own slate of 60 unstable, looney-toon, mad-as-a-hatter, crazy motherf**kers." –Bill Maher

"So please liberals start trolling Whole Foods parking lots, nude beaches, erotic cake stores, the MSNBC commissary. Anywhere where you might find angry left-wing lunatics to create a party within a party, as the Tea Party is a party within the Republicans, and to show that we will not back down in a crazy-off against anybody. The party within a party will be called the Donner Party." –Bill Maher

"That’s right, we will literally eat each other before we give an inch, and this is our leader, Face Ripper Monkey… And don’t tell me that there already is such an entity on the left, that it’s the ACLU, Greenpeace and Oh please, those are educated people lawyers and scientists. We need loudmouths and bad dressers who can match the tea people maniac for maniac, and say to them you think you can be pea brained, single minded, and purple with rage?" –Bill Maher

"Well, the Donner Party is a dog that can bark at a pine cone for nine days and not get tired. You say no new taxes on the rich. We say tax the rich at 100%. You call for a constitutional amendment banning abortion. We call for a federally funded partial birth abortions at the drive-thru at McDonalds. You want Reagan on the fifty dollar bill. We insist on Jeanine Garofalo, because apparently crazy is the new sensible and will not lose the war of bad ideas." –Bill Maher

Is this the face of a crazy woman? She and her handlers approved the picture before it was published, but other conservative groups have said that her eyes look crazy in this picture, they found it unsettling having her stare at them from the supermarket check-out line... Yet, Michelle is one of the frontrunners going into this weekend's meaningless Ames Poll at the University of Iowa. State caucasus and election don't happen until a little over a year from now, and so many things can happen between now and then. the only good thing that could happen after this Iowa poll, is that Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum may have to drop out... Michelle is looking good ever since she attended the first candidate's debate, looking more alive than the men, and putting her answers in neat, short sound bites, all the better for old folks to understand... Besides, I worry more nowadays about Mr Bachmann, who really is out of his freaking mind...

No comments:

Post a Comment

Hi! Thanks for commenting. I always try to respond...