"Over the past few months there's been an increasing buzz that Mitt Romney will pick a vice president who's safe, white, and duller than him. Which pretty much narrows it down to a piece of chalk." – Jay Leno
"Just two weeks after a felon in jail got 41 percent of the democratic vote in West Virginia, President Obama got embarrassed again in Arkansas yesterday when an unknown lawyer got 42 percent. See, that proves once and for all that there's only a 1 percent difference between a lawyer and a convicted felon." – Jay Leno
"According to a study released today, the average member of Congress can only speak at a tenth grade level. Which is worse than it sounds, because the average tenth grader speaks at a third grade level." – Jay Leno
"Remember Al Gore, the tubby vice president? He has a new girlfriend – that is unless the Supreme Court takes her away from him." – David Letterman
One of my favorite stories comes from a conservative Islamic candidate, who was very anti-USA. It turned out that he almost didn't make it as a viable candidate, once it came out that his sister and mother lived in the US, in the People's Republic of Santa Monica. His mother had become a citizen of the US, and owned a California driver's license. Guessing why he was the only family member who was so uptight, it was theorized that he wasn't allowed to visit because of his views, or it might have been the care-baskets his mother sent him from Cantor's that pissed him off... The Egyptian legislature changed the law insisting that a candidate for president' parent had to be residents of Egypt, and that controversy went away, except for the occasional chuckle whenever he would go out and lecture...
Another group of stories and videos, that were widely shown but not reported at all in the US, are the travails of Ahmed Shafik, the former general and prime minister from the Mubarak government. Whenever he made personal appearances in order to give a speech, he was often met with a barrage of shoes thrown at him, and we all know what THAT means... It's as if people have been saving their old shoes for years, waiting for such an occasion... We should know who will have made the run-off vote by the end of this weekend. The next president will determine the tone of the next constitution, the amount of power he has versus the amount given the military, and many other decisions that will affect the region for many years to come. It would be a shame if someone was elected that turned the people's optimism into cynicism, which is the natural phase of emotions after any election. Just don't hurry the process along, like al Maliki did in Iraq... Oh, yeah, don't forget the normal accusations of vote tampering and corruption, those are always many and numerous, and ignored from Cairo to Tehran to Florida and Ohio...
There have been several theories as to why production has increased, all pointing fingers in different directions, depending on who you talk to. The Thais point out that now that they are semi-retired, military generals in Myanmar spend their time in the drug trade, beats sitting around and praying, I guess. Myanmar officials say that its the ethnic tribes like the Wa and Karin who have traditionally dealt in the drug trade in order to buy weapons to fight the military, so you should look to their areas for cultivation. On the world market, as the war in Afghanistan winds down, less heroin is being flown out by the CIA and private mercenaries, reopening the market to competition. The Chinese are currently more interested in making money from prescription drugs, both legally made and illegally, though the older, traditional ties from the Triads still hold.