Monday, December 19, 2011

Take The Last Train To Pyongyang




George W Bush's Axis of Evil just lost another rung with the death of North Korea's Kim Jong-il. Now we're going to have to refer to Iran as the Axle of Evil, or if we want to appeal to a slightly younger crowd, the Axl Rose of Evil...

According to the Korean media, the Beloved Leader died of a heart attack a couple of days ago, while he was on his personal train choogling around the countryside. Because parts of North Korea is a bit backwards, they had to ice the corpse down for the two day trip back to the capitol. This gave everyone time to compose themselves and decide if they were going to support Kim's heir, young Kim Jung-un, or drown him in a freak accident...

We'll see what happens over the next few weeks, what kind of a man Jung-un turns out to be. Will he be as crazy as his father and grandfather, or will he become a stooge for the miltary, or will he hide in his room playing World of Warcraft? South Korea isn't taking any chances, they are beefing up troops at the border, and China is dispatching a lot of diplomats, hoping to keep the situation stable.

North Korea has made paranoia an institution for the last sixty years, saying that all of their ignorance, poverty, and stunted sense of culture is because the USA wanted to invade and annihilate them. Only the diligence of their military and Beloved Leaders stood in our way. Unfortunately, the rest of the world pretty much forgot about them unless they produced a tantrum to get the world's attention. And just like all other countries run by their military and intelligence officers, they stole their citizens blind...

Here's hoping that young Kim Jong-un can step up and bring his country into the 21st century, but as cynical as I am, I doubt that continuing a corrupt line of dictatorship will be the way to do it... And here's hoping there will be enough time to make those changes, before our blood-thirsty politicians start hollering for "regime change..."


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