I Am Professional Left, Bombing Iran This Week?

Julian Zelizer
Maureen Dowd

"I hear these people saying he's like George Bush. Those people ought to be drug-tested. I mean, it's crazy." - Robert Gibbs

"Republicans often find a way to exploit their extremes for political advantage, while Democratic extremes typically do damage to a Democratic president." - Maureen Dowd

Evidently I am a member of the "professional left," according to White House Press Secretary, mainly because I support paring down or getting rid of the Pentagon. But I first heard the suggestion years ago from a very conservative Republican, my mother. She also was the one who told me to keep out of any debates over abortion, because, as a man, it wasn't any of my damned business. She was a lifelong Republican, yet she refused to vote for anyone who opposed abortion rights for women, and found herself often voting Democratic because of her views on this issue... although I consider myself a moderate, I do have some very left-sided views, mixed with some conservative ones, which I feel is normal for most adults. I have been getting some violent worded emails lately, saying that I should be blown up off this planet, and I attribute this to my war against mentally ill people, or extreme right wingers, whom I see responsible for most of the misery and cruelty on our planet. Right wing extremism is found in every country, under different religious and political ideologies, but the deformed mental processes result in the same kind of behavior, whether it's in Iran, Israel, or Alabama and Texas...


The real craziness may happen this week: Iran's new nuclear power plant will come online next week, so the window of opportunity for Israel to bomb the site is this week. After that, the presence of nuclear fuel means that massive civilians deaths could happen if the nuclear fuel is ignited, causing a nuclear reaction. Also, the deaths of the Russians who will bring the plant online would bring them into the retaliation mix, starting another world war... Keeping a new war geographically in the Middle East is seen as a success, unless an enraged China gets involved, so you could see how this could easily escalate beyond all control.

Iran has been warning everyone to please, not attack, and issuing stern warnings of retaliation if it should happen. Tehran has plans to assassinate the leaders of Saudi Arabia and the UAE. We'll see if cooler heads prevail, but Israel has been saying how they don't need any "green light" from the US to make their decisions. So, this week could be the beginning of the end as we know it, and we have the right wing wackos that rule Israel to thank for it, and the right wing wackos that rule Iran for being so stubborn and continuing their nuclear program in secrecy....

"Why can't we all just get along" - Rodney King

Of course, the police beat the shit out of Rodney King, but still... Why can't Iran just give us Osama bin Laden and become our new Best Friends Forever? Well, it wouldn't last. Iran is now dissing its new friends, Brazil, for the audacity of offering shelter to the Iranian woman who was sentenced to death by stoning (throwing stones, not getting stoned), and now having the al-Qaeda leader lash out at Turkey for having been on friendly terms with Israel. That's the problem with trying to come back into the right wing wacko faction of Islam; you can never be Islamic enough for those tough, old, illiterate Imams...

South Korea's leader has announced the steps that could be taken to re-unite North and South Korea. The 28 year old leader of the North has responded by making even more dire threats against the South... OK, the Kims were really reacting yet again to the announcement of the annual US - South Korea naval maneuvers, planned to begin this week, unless all US Navy vessels are recalled elsewhere, all of a sudden. These naval maneuvers are not to be confused by the recent ones just held, those were a mere preliminary, a joint exercise that was planned to freak out the North. It worked, they confiscated a small fishing boat and won't give it back, then fired 150 artillery rounds into an empty ocean. But this time they will mean business! They might even sneak over to Japan and steal some more babies to raise as Koreans!

So, if we're all still here after next week, we can then be shamed into following through on our pledged relief contributions to Pakistan, which is about 1/3 under water. Ban Ki-Moon has been pleading for more relief, as most of the developed world is tapped out due to the global recession, thanks to Goldman Sachs and other Wall Street firms. None which has made any commitments, by the way. Besides, it looks like the same, sad story that happened to Haiti is replaying here. Over 60% of the aid pledged to Haiti has yet to come through, and it looks like it never will. The government of Haiti hasn't removed the rubble from the earthquake yet, and there are thousands of people still living under plastic tarps, not even tents. The aid scams that were perfected in Iraq and Afghanistan is now sucking what little goodwill is left. Charities take over 98% of money donated for administrative costs and distribute what little is left to those in need, placing a larger burden on the few charities that actually do help and make a difference. Oh, where is John Travolta flying to next when we need him and his yellow t-shirted Scientologists the most?