Pimp my CRIB, Illinois Gets So Lonely Without Blago...

David Brooks
Dana Milbank
Peter Orszag
Jeffrey Gedmin

"This is the only country where poverty leads to obesity. And why is that? Because with food stamps you can go buy Twinkies, Milk Duds, and a six-pack of Bud, and then head home to one of your two color TVs as you live in poverty to watch the NFL on satellite TV." - Rush Limbaugh

"They released this week four prisoners who were previously held in Guantanamo Bay, and they've been cleared of their charges. And listen to this: they're resettling them in Bermuda and giving them each $100,000. In a related story, the entire population of Detroit said today they are part of al Qaeda." --Bill Maher



The new bad boys have formed a new club, and were in Russia for a summit meeting, trying to draw some attention to themselves. They call themselves BRIC, short for Brazil, Russia, India, and China, but if they really wanted to get the US's attention, they could rearange their acronym to read CRIB, and yes, host a hip tv show, Pimp my CRIB...

From the NY Times: "The first summit meeting of the so-called BRIC group — Brazil, Russia, India and China — was intended to underscore the rising economic clout of these four major developing countries and their demand for a greater voice in the world. And Russia, the group’s host and ideological provocateur, was especially interested in using the summit to fire a shot across Washington’s bow.

Shortly before the BRIC summit opened, a senior Kremlin economic adviser told reporters that Russia was considering moving some of its currency reserves out of dollars and into bonds issued by the other three BRIC countries... At the same time, most economists say the BRIC countries can do little to change the current architecture of the global financial system, and that the outcome of this meeting will be largely symbolic.

The BRIC countries comprise about 15 percent of the world economy and, perhaps more important, have about 40 percent of global currency reserves. Brazil, India and China have also weathered the financial crisis better than the world as a whole.

While they are far from a monolithic group, they are generally united in their frustration with the dollar’s status as the world’s reserve currency, which enables Washington to run budget deficits without fear of facing the kind of budgetary day of reckoning that other countries risk.

The excess dollars pile up in foreign central banks, leaving those countries with a difficult choice: reinvesting the dollars in United States securities or holding them and facing an increase in the value of their own currencies, making their products less competitive in world markets."

Russia has been trying to consolidate its influence over former satellite territories, by creating a collective security agreement: " — which some see as an eventual counterweight to NATO — was signed by the leaders of Armenia, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Russia and Tajikistan. It was not signed by Uzbekistan, which has raised objections to some provisions, or Belarus. Andrei Popov, a spokesman for Belarus’s Foreign Ministry, told the Interfax news agency that the agreement was not valid because there was no consensus among members." In retaliation, Russia banned a list of over 1,200 dairy products that normally is imported from Belarus into Russia, and is a crippling blow to that country's economy.

During last winter, Russia turned off the natural gas that flowed through the Ukraine and into Europe, saying that the Ukraine hadn't paid their bill and showing them that they had little clout when it came to negotiating the price of gas with the new Russia. I can only wait to see what happens as Russia gets to play more and more on the world stage, what heavy, non-subtle tactics they will use to get their way, promoting a new cold war in the process. In Israel, while Benjamin Netanyahu plays with the US, his RIGHT right hand, Avigdor Lieberman is cozying up to Mother Russia's generous teat, an image I created with Putin in mind...


Citizens of Illinois have often taken a perverse pride in the history of corruption that thrives in their state. After removing their , a lot of tough talking was done by every legislator to any media source that would listen, how they were gonna clean up this town for decent, God fearin' folk like Sarah and Joe... Yet, according to the NY Times this year they fell way short of their stated goals: "State leaders, for example, delayed until later in the year a proposal to make the system of redrawing political districts less political; failed to decide on a proposal to let voters to recall political leaders; put off to further study the notion of financing campaigns with public money; and pushed aside a series of politically sensitive proposals to bolster legal tools for the authorities to investigate political corruption, set term limits for state lawmakers in leadership positions, and shorten the campaign season by moving primary election dates closer to general election.

David Hoffman, a member of Mr. Quinn’s reform commission who is also the inspector general for the City of Chicago, said, “We should have been able to get more on some of these important issues because its unlikely that’s there’s going to be a repeat performance.”

So, it doesn't matter if they spared the Rod or not, typical state-approved political corruption can continue unabated because they won't get around to it next year, or the year after that, or... leaving poor Mrs Blagojevich to continue eating giant bugs in rainforests to put grubs on the family table...

thank God Sarah Palin accepted David Letterman's apology...

late night jokes:

"Television, tonight, has finally gone completely digital in the United States of America ... Analog TV signals are no longer being beamed through the air, and yet monologue jokes will still be flying over Sarah Palin's head." --Bill Maher

"Our friend David Letterman made a harmless joke about Bristol Palin and everyone went nuts. Please, she's a grown girl. She can take care of herself. ... Not that the Republicans don't every week have a case of fake outrage, but this was especially ridiculous this week. Dave Letterman then invited Sarah Palin and her daughter onto the show, the young one, Willow. And Sarah Palin said, it would be wise to keep Willow away from him. That's right, he's 62 years old, he's going to f*ck her right there on the stage. He's going to pull open his jacket, take his stint from his heart surgery out and have his way with her right there. ... I'd worry a little more about the 18-year-old hockey players who knock up your daughters regularly." --Bill Maher

"David Letterman is from Indiana. This is not in his DNA to make a joke like this. In fact, the only bright side to this is that finally, there's a comedian under fire for inappropriate remarks and it's not me." --Bill Maher

"They had elections today in Iran. Apparently it's still too close to call. They say if the vote is still close by tomorrow, there will be a runoff election next week, and then the usual series of lawsuits from Norm Coleman." --Bill Maher

"It's a little different over there when they have an election in Iran, because the women, they get to vote over there. Unlike our ally Saudi Arabia. But in Iran, the women get to vote and it's great, because they're already wearing the booth." --Bill Maher

"It's been reported, I think this just came out today, that 11 percent of Americans still think that President Obama is a Muslim. Apparently, it's the same 11 percent who still think Adam Lambert would be perfect for their daughter." --Conan O'Brien

"The country of Iran is holding its presidential election with four candidates running. Iranians will have to decide which candidate is best prepared to lead them into the 12th century." --Conan O'Brien

"This is crazy. You probably saw this. Former President George Bush Sr. celebrated his 85th birthday today by skydiving with CNN anchor Robin Meade. Fox News reported the story as, 'Liberal media pushes old man out of airplane.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Tonight's the night of the big television digital switchover. According to some estimates, when the analog signal is cut off and switched to digital tonight, nearly 1 million people could be left without TV service,' which 'means NBC could lose dozens of viewers." --Conan O'Brien

"There's a movie out now called 'The Taking of Pelham 1, 2, 3.' And it's a remake. They originally made this movie in 1974. But it's been updated, this movie. In this version, the subway is hijacked by Somali pirates." --David Letterman

"Hey, celebrity birthday. Donald Trump, 63 years old this weekend. Trump says he'll celebrate this year by destroying pristine wetlands and putting up overpriced condos." --David Letterman

"Yesterday, President Obama wrote a note for a fourth grade girl who skipped school so she could attend his town hall meeting. I don't see what the big deal is. Bush wrote notes to fourth graders, too. He just called them speeches." --Jimmy Fallon

Letterman's Top Ten Questions Congress Is Receiving About the Digital Switchover

10. If I don't switch over, is my teevee gonna 'splode?
9. Is this 'cuz of the swine flu?
8. Can I still mute "The View"?
7. Will I have to do a digital switchover for my waffle maker also?
6. Any chance this will make Letterman funny?
5. Can you help me? I swallowed my remote.
4. Uh ... is that today?
3. Can you pass a law to bring back "Gunsmoke"?
2. Does this mean Oprah can finally see me watching her?
1. Seriously, shouldn't you idiots be working on the economy?