GOP Convention Part 2, The Lost Hours...

"Did you all watch the Republican convention last night? It's good to see scripted television finally making a comeback." – Jay Leno

"Hurricane Isaac turned out to be not much of a threat to the Republican convention. But to their credit, the Republicans had a contingency plan. If the hurricane did hit hard, delegates were instructed to evacuate to Mitt Romney's tax shelter." – Jay Leno

"The White House is now brewing its own beer. Republicans say the White House beer is actually pretty good. Just don't drink the Kool-Aid." – Jay Leno

It was left to the very end, for Mitt Romney to show that he was a caring family man who built a successful business; that he was a man of ideas who could solve our economic crisis and find jobs for millions of Americans. He did well on the first part, matching the tone of the brief speeches beforehand telling us what a generous and compassionate guy he is. He wisely never mentioned that his great grandparents and great-great grandparents were federal fugitives, chased out of the US and moving to Mexico where they could preach and practice polygamy. One grandfather had twelve wives... That's why his dad was born in Mexico, and it would be interesting to see Mitt's birth certificate to see if he has more than one mother listed...

I also was hit with the impression that Mitt Romney's smile reminds me of the cartoon smiles I've seen on a shark or in a Batman comic book. The basic problem with the rest of his speech is that it lacked content. It was satisfying on an emotional level, interesting where it was designed to appeal to voters of both parties who have become disillusioned with Obama's performance. But not once did he veer from bland platitudes and give any real policies or plans to steer our economy and create new jobs, nor does his web site list anything, either. He promised 12 million new jobs, but one independent study had predicted that those 12 million jobs would be created naturally over the next few years. In other words, even if Romney or Obama did nothing, the natural recovery rate would create that many jobs, still short of the 23 million needed...

Speaking of cons, what was up with Clint Eastwood? On the positive side, he showed that California Republicans aren't like the ones in the rest of the nation. On the flip side, he demonstrated that he can't carry a conversation unless he has a script in his hand, nor does he have much of a sense of humor. There was an empty chair next him at the podium, where he pretended an invisible Barack Obama was sitting, and he had imaginary conversations where Barack told him and Mitt to go fuck themselves. Ha Ha... Then, Mario Rubio had to introduce Mitt Romney... But, the crowd reveled in the bad taste, shouting out slogans like "Make my day!" along with a rambling and addled Mr Eastwood.

Was this convention a success? It hit some good spots and resonated with the crowd at times, so they didn't leave depleted and cynical. I doubt that it changed anybody's mind, except to note what a sleazy liar Paul Ryan turned out to be. But hey, at least he's not a Sarah Palin... Despite speeches from women and people of color, it was still designed to reinforce old white men and their antiquated set of values. It the Republican Party is to ever rebuild, we are going to have to wait until the old white guys die off and leave their money to their kids, which, unfortunately, will be years down the road.

After all of the speeches, I flipped around the channels to see what the commentaries were. I was surprised that the most generous analysis was given by MSNBC, while CNN and Fox were not as nice. Rachel Maddow comes across as the smartest woman on television and is worth listening to, no matter how liberal or conservative you are.

Republican Convention

"They’re all going down to Tampa where an Evangelical party is going to nominate a Mormon and a Catholic and then get wiped out by a hurricane…leaving Florida to the Jews as God intended." – Bill Maher

"Some of the Republicans, I think, are over-reacting to Hurricane Isaac — like today Rick Santorum was seen gathering up two of every animal." – Jay Leno

"Herman Cain was in Tampa. When a reporter asked him if Isaac reminded him of Katrina, he said, 'I never even met the woman.'" – Jay Leno

"It seems the GOP has placed 13,000 umbrellas in bins outside the hall for people to use. Delegates can't bring them inside for security reasons, so after you use the umbrella, you drop it off for the next person to use. That sounds like creeping socialism." – Jay Leno

I've spent the last two nights listening to the speeches from the Republican Convention in Tampa, Florida. Because the program on the first night was canceled because of Hurricane Isaac,we missed the spectacle of Donald Trump hiring a Barack Obama look-a-like and then getting to tell him that he's fired on the convention stage...

Tuesday's speeches got off to a rocky start, with the best one given by Anne Romney. She proved personable even though she failed to make her husband seem more human. It's nice to know that he still makes her laugh, but that was the deepest revelation she gave us. Perhaps they have an equally shallow relationship, communicating with each other in thumbnail sketches instead of real emotions... Anne also made an attempt to connect to the other women in the hall, evidently she is the Republican response that their isn't a war on women. I would have been more impressed if she handed out some of those Mormon Church's official condoms and dental dams... The keynote speech was given by Chris Christie, who gave an aggressive and self-absorbed speech, finally condescending to mention Mitt Romney after 16 minutes had gone by. Who would guessed that New Jersey was so fascinating? The New Jersey economy is failing under Mr Christie's bluster, and unemployment has increased by over a million more people.

The Romney camp has decided to slight a few fellow conservatives, neither Dick Cheney, George Bush, or Sarah Palin were invited to the convention. It was feared that Cheney might have shot Paul Ryan in the face, then tried to get himself on as the VP choice. Sarah Palin would have energized the crazy element and distracted the energy away from Romney, who really can't compete with anyone with charisma. And, of course, George Bush wasn't welcome because he would have made people remember that the problems we have are not all Obama's fault...

Each speaker had to mention the catch-phrase "we built it" or get demerits. The phrase is a misconstruction from an Obama speech, taken out of context, and then repeated so many times that it is a meaningless cliche. Obama himself was paraphrasing Elizabeth Warren when she said last year: “There is nobody in this country who got rich on his own — nobody!” she said. “You built a factory out there? Good for you. But I want to be clear: You moved your goods to market on the roads the rest of us paid for; you hired workers the rest of us paid to educate; you all were safe in your factory because of police forces and fire forces that the rest of us paid for. ...
“You built a factory, and it turned into something terrific or a great idea? God bless. Keep a big hunk of it. But part of the underlying social contract is, you take a hunk of that and pay forward for the next kid who comes along.”

The most intelligent and elegant speech was given by Condoleezza Rice, who emphasized the importance of a good education and the importance that immigrants give to our diversity, not the biggest applause of the night, and a bit subversive. I'm sure that there were a few delegates having buyer's remorse over Mitt, saying we coulda nominated a Condi...

The scariest speech was given by John McCain, who has become such a hawk that he'd have us at war with six more Middle Eastern nations. Of course, his anger is rooted in losing the last presidential election, and now has become a bitter, bitter man.

The most attention will be given to Paul Ryan's speech, which set the delegates into an uproar. They loved him, even when his facts were incorrect. His delivery was spot on, and his speech was written by two of the best Republican speechmakers in the business. Two things he's going to have to correct, are the weird noises he makes in his throat after delivering an emotional line, and the black shoe polish that he put in his hair, which makes him look like a teenage boy who got into his mother's makeup bag... What bothers me the most were the blatant factual lies in his speech while purporting to be truthful and honest. This type of hypocrisy is distressing in someone so young, and if this kind of amoral behavior takes ahold among the younger generation of politicians, it signals more than the death of the Republican Party, but the death of all politics as we know it... even Ron Paul had to flee Tampa back to Texas...

Tomorrow Mitt will give his acceptance speech, and they have been hinting at a mystery guest, one that will make Obama angry. Let's hope that it is someone more than Clint Eastwood or Donald Trump and the fake Obama stand-in guy...

Paul Ryan's Star Rises Like The Sales Of AK-47's In America

"Mitt Romney is hoping to energize Republicans by announcing Paul Ryan as his running mate. Seriously? That's like trying to spice up a bowl of oatmeal with more oatmeal." – Jimmy Fallon

"During the announcement, Mitt Romney said that he and Paul Ryan are 'America's Comeback Team.' You know, as in 'come back in four years and try again.'" – Jimmy Fallon

"Romney and Ryan kind of look like a father and son in an ad for Super Cuts." – Jimmy Kimmel

We recently had President Obama campaigning in Colorado. The tickets to hear him speak were free, and they were quickly given away. In contrast, the GOP had Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal out pimping for Mitt Romney at the same time. maybe 200 people showed up... Now that Mitt announced that Paul Ryan would be his VP choice, Mr Jindal must feel a little burned... The polls currently show that Mr Obama is ahead of Mr Romney in popularity, and he may jump out ahead if people react negatively to Mr Ryan's tightly puckered policies and positions.

Paul is considered to be a super conservative who gives voice to the tea party concerns in Congress. He has sponsored a national bill that would give "personhood" to an infant at the moment of conception. So far, none of the personhood amendments have passed in the states where they have been introduced, including twice here in Colorado. Refusing to take a hint from the voters, the personhood people are going to put it on the ballot here again in November, and have vowed to keep on introducing it until it passes. See, who says we aren't providing stable jobs...? The personhood amendment movement began here in Colorado Springs and it's a bit embarrassing to the tea party anti-abortion folks that they can't even convince their homies that their ideas aren't wacko and way out there...

Paul is most famous for his belief in trickle-down economics, and he has been chairman of the House Budget Committee, a job he will have to give up. He has been involved in every budget fight and obstruction for the past two years, and has signed up to be Mitt's attack weasel for the next two months. What bothers me about Paul Ryan is he is another rich kid who never had to work very hard for a living, and hasn't bothered to develop much compassion for anyone who isn't a millionaire. His grandfather built the families wealth by building roads from government contracts, which may be better than Romney's grandfather, who was a federal fugitive for running around the country with his five wives, spreading the gospel of polygamy... He was elected to Congress at age 28, and hasn't known much or experienced life beyond the small town he was raised in and Washington DC. Paul also tends to be thin-skinned and whinny if he feels he's being made fun of or his expertise in understanding economics is brought into question. The fact that his budget has been analyzed to both cost more than he's promised it would and not solve the problems he says it will, makes one wonder if years of flattery hasn't made him intellectually lazy.
Paul Ryan is on the ballot to make Mitt Romney seem legitimately right wing, but I doubt he will seem attractive to many other voters. It's just another signal of the death of the Republican Party...


It's nice to know that the Russian factory that makes the Kalashnikov rifle, has recently been focusing on sales to civilians. Their sales rose over 50% last year, thanks to strong sales within the US. We have the pride of being the strongest market in the world for guns bought by civilians. Certainly puts the recent crazy people shooting and killing in Colorado and Texas into perspective, doesn't it???? In order for a Russian to buy a long barrel gun like an AK-47, they have to have a permit from the police clearing them of any criminal record, and a certificate of mental health from a doctor...

Mitt's European Adventure

"Kiss my ass! This is a sacred site..." - Rick Gorka

Mitt Romney made a trip across the pond, to prove that he had a solid feel for foreign policy and hoping that somehow he might attract the crowds that Barack Obama did when he visited Europe as a candidate. But, since Mitt is pretty vacant and clueless, all he ended up doing is embarrassing himself and his hosts.

When he was in England, he made comments about the level of organization exhibited at the Olympics, and was jumped on by every newspaper and politician in sight, including the conservative mayor of London, Boris Johnson. To be fair, they would have jumped on any American serving up criticism, and it was pretty tame compared to the verbal lashings English politicians receive when they have to appear before Parliament. But all Mitt had to do was smile and say nothing more than he was there to support his wife. Instead, I was looking to see if he was signaling the beginning of a Monty Python skit on upper-class twits...

Next, Mitt flew to Israel, to suck up to Benjamin Netanyahu in front of his new best friend, Sheldon Addelson. Mr Addelson had committed millions of dollars to conservative PACs, and has made his money from owning gambling casinos in Las Vegas and Macau. Of course, Mitt made a speech sucking up to the Israelis, saying that it was their culture that had made them so successful, as compared to to their neighbors. This was treated as a gaffe and the Palestinians responded that gee, they might also have become as successful if only their land wasn't occupied by a people dedicated to their failure. The Palestinian Authority said that:

"This man lacks information, knowledge, vision and understanding of this region and its people."

Mr Romney was hoping to embarrass the Obama administration and their lack of chummyness with the right wing Israelis. But the Israeli Defense Minister Ehud Barack told CNN on Monday, that "I should tell you honestly that this administration under President Obama is doing in regard to our security more than anything that I can remember in the past."

The mystery of Mitt's trip was, why Poland? It was determined that the government would be most receptive to whatever he had to say, since most exposure to the press had been restricted and scripted, with no room for spontaneity. When Mitt did venture outside, it was at the grave for the unkown soldier, and the press shouted out questions. Mitt's press secretary then shouted out the quote from above, making it the most wonderful quote of the year in many a pundit's book...

Now that Mitt is back, it's clear that things did not go as planned because he forgot to include the human element. It looks more and more that when you compare Obama and Romney's personalities side by side, that Obama will end up re-elected.

I have two main questions for Mitt Romney, neither have been asked by the press or his opponents: One, since he has raised five sons, tell us why none of them volunteered for the armed services? Mitt himself had a couple of student deferments during the Vietnam War, and one ministerial deferment. If he is so patriotic, why aren't his sons willing to serve their country?

Two: I don't really care if he has Swiss bank accounts and accounts in the Cayman Islands, what I want to know is if he is willing to transfer all of this money back into the United States if he gets elected? Shouldn't an American President show trust in American banks and institutions?

We've never had to deal with such a rich candidate before, and if politics requires more and more money, then we are going to have to rewrite the rules, and the sooner we begin the better...


Finally, this little tidbit from TPM: "Pentagon’s Missile Defense Agency warns staffers to stop using the missile defense computer network to download so much porn..."

Mickey Mouse in North Korea, Free Pussy Riot!

"I secretly want Romney to win because, look, I'm a comedian. Mitt Romney is an ultra-Caucasian Mormon zillionaire who uses his dog as a hood ornament. For me not to secretly want him as President, it's like Halliburton secretly not wanting a war." – Bill Maher

"People will now have to have health insurance. The same way every driver in California has car insurance." – Jay Leno

"The Democratic Convention is $27 million in debt. They had to cancel the kick-off event at the Charlotte Motor Speedway. A speedway is the perfect place for the Democratic Convention. You go around in circles, turn left every few seconds, and you end up right where you started. " – Jay Leno

I apologize for the long time since my last post, I took a vacation and then the hills surrounding the city I live in caught on fire. For awhile it seemed as if all of Manitou Springs and Colorado Springs would go down in flames, but the most populated parts were spared. Then, my neighbor died, one of my favorite grumpy old men, and we are still mourning his passing. I admit to being so depressed by events that I felt little compulsion to find anything humorous in the news... Next, my brother-in-law's father passed away, so he and my sister drove off to Illinois for a week,  and I've been left here to babysit their 3 small dogs, who had to share a space on my bed with my cat. Finally, my next door neighbor came back from her vacation only to have to put down her cat, and now her old dog, too, which had developed neurological problems and could barely drag her back legs around.

I was most enamored with the story out of North Korea, that the new ruler, Kim Jung-Un, had sponsored a concert starring a few Disney characters in costume, Tigger, Winnie the Pooh, Mickey and Minnie Mouse. The concert was broadcast by North Korean television, and presided over by the young leader and his stylish wife, although no information was given at the time who she was or how long they had been married. Tp prove how prissy Disney has become, they denounced the concert as not being licensed or officially approved by them, because they don't agree showing Disney on Socialism... What also was not given was where did North Korea obtain those costumes? Did they buy them or have to rent them? Or did they steal them like they used to do with Japanese nationals? The obvious answer is that Disneyland Tokyo provided the costumes, but their not admitting anything... Also interesting to know if one of the "youthful" changes that the young leader will make, is to have Mickey Mouse become the official government spokesmouse...

We now have a generation of world leaders who have had an education in a Western country. North Korea's Kim Jung-Un was schooled in Switzerland, while the new leaders of Tunisia and Egypt were educated in the US. Egypt's Mr Morsi also taught at the college level here, and has two children still living in the US. Most of the business and military elite in the Middle East have all gone to college in the US or Europe, proving that we are truly becoming a melting pot of different cultures. Of course, there is always a downside, as exhibited by Syria's Bashar al Assad, and have you noticed that about half of the current government officials in Kabul used to own restaurants in New york and Washington DC?

Free Pussy Riot!!! The Russian band Pussy Riot went on trial today for the spurious charges of committing "an act of hooliganism under religious motives," for performing an anti-Putin song at the altar of the Cathedral of Christ the Savior, part of the newly resurgent and power-hungry Russian Orthodox Church. That a judge agreed to hear this case and is taking the procedures seriously, shows what a mockery most laws and courts have become in Russia.

The prosecutors charge that the performance caused great "moral damage" to 10 people who complained about the performance, and that the band intentionally meant to "inflict grievous mental suffering." Jeez, everyone is a music critic... This charade is an obvious attempt to by the court to suck up to Vladimir Putin, who still can't believe that not everyone loves him and the high-handed way that he rules. Perhaps the judge is trying to secure that plum job for her children with a Putin owned oil company, so she can be taken care of after she retires in six months... Whatever, the lawyers for Pussy Riot said that the charges are politically motivated by the Russian Orthodox Church, who also os trying to suck up to the Kremlin, so their Patriarch will be able to drive around in his new Bentley, shallow and vain man that he is. The end result could easily be that the girls will be sentenced to 5 years in prison. They would have to rename their band Putin's Pussy to acknowledge that he got the better of them, and let that be a warning to everyone who is opposed to our Dear Leader, who seems to think that this country is his personal KGB playground... I haven't the faintest idea if the band is actually good or not, maybe there will be something on youtube and I can listen to them tonight. Maybe they'll come out of this trial with a recording contract, or at least allowed to record the soundtrack of the Russian opposition...

Japanese Nuclear Plants To Reopen? Racism In Israel

Top 10 Benefits of Nuclear Power

10)  Three Headed Fish.
9)   Atomic energy keeps the Japanese people stoic and panic-free.
8)   Nuclear power provides cheap energy without any risk (aside from meltdowns, radiation poisoning, mutations, and unknown unknowns).
7)   'Nuclear' Power takes precedent over other humanitarian disasters, making easier work for media.
6)   Atomic power is cleaner than coal ... except for the thousands of years of radiation that follows a nuclear meltdown.
5)   Nuclear power gives disaster and rescue crews something else to work on.
4)   Nuclear power forces Iran and North Korea to be fully prepared for calamitous disasters.
3)   All the cleanup and recovery work after a nuclear meltdown is good for the economy.
2)   Nuclear Power provides energy for Charlie Sheen's atomic meltdown.

... and the #1 Benefit of Nuclear Power is:

1)   Nuclear Power made Mr. Burns the wealthiest man in Springfield.

(Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.)


Japan has witnessed dueling prime ministers, as the past one, Naoto Kan, gave testimony that it was still too dangerous to start up again the Fukushima nuclear power plant, or any of Japan's 50 nuclear plants that are currently sitting idle. The current prime minister, Yoshihiko Noda, pretty much ignored Kan's statements and took to the television, trying to drum up public support for reopening a few plants on a trial basis, from now until September. Unfortunately, there has been no overhaul of the oversight and regulation to the nuclear industry, setting the stage for a repeat of plant operators hiding safety violations, and regulators accepting bribes to ignore it and look the other way. No safety improvements for the nuclear plants have been submitted, and the Fukushima plant remains a danger. To date, I have not seen anyone address the fact that the plans for the Fukushima plant were the cheapest to build and over 30 years old, with nothing proposed to modernize similar plants in Japan.

Here in the US, the Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia just ruled against the Nuclear Regulatory Commission, when the commission decided that it was safe to store spent fuel rods at nuclear plants for the next 100 years or so, because we haven't figured out a way to make it safe or create a national depository for them. Currently, spent fuel rods are stored in pools of water, and are susceptible to earthquakes and other natural disasters, oh, you know, like what happened at Fukushima, Japan... This lack of knowledge and planning is carried out in nuclear plants all over the world. Back in the good-old-days, countries like France and Germany could give the waste contracts to the mafia, who would then put the nuclear waste in 55 gallon drums and dump them in places like  off the coast of Somalia, which ruined their fishing industry... As the NY Times points out, the court said that the nuclear commission had reached its conclusions only by examining past leaks. But that history "tells us very little about the potential for future leaks or the harm such leaks might portend..."

"More than a year into to the Arab Spring, one inconvenient and politically incorrect truth stands out: the Arabs are much better at acquiring and fighting over power than they are at sharing it" - from the Angry Arab

There has been a diaspora happening in Africa, due to wars and drought, with many people fleeing to the Middle East and North Africa. Once upon a time they might have been hired as mercenaries into the armies of Moammar Qaddhafi, but that option is now eliminated. The friendly bedouin tribes that they come across, will handily kidnap, rob, and rape them, then leave them for dead. If they are lucky, they might make it to a city or enlightened country, like Israel.

Unfortunately, the Israeli supreme court just ruled that all Sudanese refugees do not have a dangerous climate to return to, which is paving the way of rounding up all of the black refugees and putting them in tent cities along the border. Think of it, tens of thousands of black refugees acting as a buffer for when the hordes of Arabs swarm across the borders, heading towards Jerusalem... Next week the first contingent of 1500 Ethiopians will be deported.

“Kidnap, robbery, sexual abuse, it’s part of everyday life here,” - Ali Al Jafri

Even more dangerous, is the racist feelings towards all blacks in Israel, who can't tell the difference between a black Muslim or a black Jew. Many years ago a group of black Jews were discovered in Ethiopia, the Falasha. They emigrated to Israel and were immediately discriminated against, treated lower than Jews of North African descent. Now, it's the Sudanese, who are being attacked as they go outside of their homes, often to the cries of "Go away, Arab!" from the Orthodox Jews. An Israeli Interior Minister, Eli Yishai, stated that most of the "Muslims that arrive here do not even believe that this country belongs to us, to the white man..."

Egypt, My Advice To Jonah Goldberg, A Drop Of Native American Blood

"Unemployment is still looking pretty bad. In fact, the White House has a new slogan on job creation: 'Hope and change the subject.'" – Jay Leno

"Mitt Romney has been giving his volunteers a free sweatshirt for making phone calls on his behalf. The sweatshirts are just like Romney, 100 percent reversible." – Jimmy Fallon

"A new survey found that Mitt Romney is ahead of Obama among those who make $36,000-$90,000. Or as Romney put it, 'And they said I can't connect with the poor.'" – Jimmy Fallon

Every time that Pakistan gets mad at us for incursions into their country hunting down "terrorists," the CIA launches more drone attacks, just to thumb their noses at the Pakistani authorities. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta has said that the Pakistanis have to realize that we will do what we damn well please, and to stop griping abut it so much. After all, we give them billions in aid that their military and politicians siphon off, it's not like they're not getting paid to look the other way... We also give money to the victim's families and aid after each devastating monsoon. We will soon move our theater of operations to Africa, the propaganda machine is sending out stories of al Qaeda training camps in Mali, and we already have CIA operatives and attending mercenaries in Yemen and Somalia...

Have you ever noticed that there isn't one place in the world that isn't corrupt?

The most interesting conversations still take place in Egypt, as the run-off election pits pro-government forces against pro-Islamic forces, whatever those vague terms mean... They are asking the liberals, which form of oppression do you like the best? The pro-government folks are acting out of the Karl Rove playbook, getting generals and judges to go on television and sound the warning, warning how dangerous it will be if the Muslim Brotherhood both runs the government and has a majority in parliament, while the MB is trying to calm the fears, and proving themselves by nominating a healthy cross-section of people to be on the committee that will come up with the new constitution. All these conversations are good to have, healthier when they are out in the open. The US and Europe have to accept that Egypt will never resemble their countries, and is forging its own path. Democracy is messy, at times it seems like chaos or a civil war, but out of it usually comes a consensus and a solid path to follow, except for Syria...

We are in the middle of a generational war of values, especially in the Republican Party. Which may explain why the older folks are acting so hysterical, and trying to force a lot of legislation through in the states and in Congress. The latest shot was fired by the tea party scion Jonah Goldberg, who suffers from no-brain syndrome, when he said that those under 30 are too dumb and shouldn't be allowed to vote...

"It is a simple fact of science that nothing correlates more with ignorance and stupidity more than youth," he said, with feeling. "We're all born idiots, and we only get over that condition as we get less young." 

"The fact that young people think socialism is better than capitalism... that's something that conservatives have to work hard to beat out of them,"

Jonah, Jonah, Jonah. You could do with some advice that I used to give obnoxious teenagers when I used to drive a bus. I told them that when they were young they could easily change their behavior and not be such an asshole, because young assholes usually grow up to be old assholes, and nobody likes an old asshole... Crude language, but Jonah, you prove my point, you ugly ugly man...

About a month ago, the Senate candidate Elizabeth Warren got into a brouhaha over her claiming she had Indian blood somewhere back in her ancestry, without any formal proof other than family stories and legends. I understand her desire to do this because my family has done the same thing.

 Supposedly, I have some roots with a Blackfoot tribe and a Ute, but more than that I couldn't tell you. I know my dad spent some summers on a Blackfoot reservation when he was a kid, and my grandmother's face resembled the Indian head on the buffalo nickel when she died. Also, we had a great-uncle that used to take his clothes off and do a war dance on the front lawn whenever he got too drunk, and that's the extent of my personal knowledge. I used to brag about it when I was in first grade, but then I realized how silly it looked for a tow-headed blond kid claiming that he was really part Indian...

But, my sister has kept up the charade, and made sure to have marked the ethnicity forms for her children as Native Americans. They now have children of their own and have stopped the trend, but it always bothered me that she kept up the ruse. Though who knows, maybe there is more than a teeny tiny percentage of Indian lineage running through my veins; I certainly never pursued it or tried to take advantage, other than sharing a couple pleasant stories with my cousins after dinner. And I'm sure that there's a lot of other folks like myself, who think that any kind of racial purity is a myth. I'm supposed to be part German, English, and Welsh, but I also know little about those kind of roots, the only kind of culture I feel close to is from California and Colorado, both ethnic melting pots. I know its worse for my sister's grandkids: their mother was Hispanic and Black, their daddy was White, and now they don't fit in anywhere...